You've worked hard to build the life you have. So why does it feel like something's missing — or worse, like you're stuck?

Here's the uncomfortable truth: the very things you're gripping tightest might be exactly what's keeping you from the life you actually want.

In this episode, Stephanie and Maren go down the rabbit hole with Alice in Wonderland to uncover her secret of letting go and explore the powerful (and often misunderstood) relationship between trust and surrender.

Inspired by a clip from renowned Buddhist teacher Pema Chödrön, they unpack the difference between surrender and weakness and explore the metaphor of Alice falling down the rabbit hole -with curiosity instead of terror- to show what it could look like to stop white-knuckling your way through change and start trusting the process.

The life you're dreaming of is not about doing more or climbing another mountain, it's actually about going inward and making space and embracing curiosity. It’s about discovery.

Key Takeaways

• Surrender isn't weakness — it's courage. Real surrender means trusting and that trust has to be built. It's a practice, not a personality trait.
• Your resistance to change is normal. Just like a caterpillar literally dissolves before becoming a butterfly, your inner immune system will fight transformation. That discomfort doesn't mean you're failing — it means you're becoming.
• The thoughts that fill your head aren't you. Write them down — I'm too old, I don't have time, it's too late — and look at them. What you witness loses its grip.
• Scrolling, snacking, and staying busy are false escapes. They give you the feeling of relief without building the actual capacity to sit with discomfort. The real practice is learning to be uncomfortable — consciously and on purpose.
• Stillness is not the same as doing nothing. Listening inward, tracking what your body is telling you, asking what is this asking of me? — that IS the work. And it changes everything in your outer world.

We'd love to hear where you are with this. Are you in the free fall right now? Grabbing for every branch on the way down? Or have you found your wings?

Find us on Facebook and LinkedIn (links below) — and come tell us your story.

If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who needs it — and subscribe so you never miss an episode.

TRANSCRIPT

YouTube Video

REFERENCES:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=TnObGF4WQkE

23:21 Pick Your Hard

26:29 Inner Mastery

Love this episode? Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts—it helps other soulful leaders find us!

Have a question or topic suggestion? We'd love to hear from you. Reach out through our website or social media.

📬 Connect With Us
Website: www.TheSoulfulLeaderPodcast.com
Main Website: www.tslp.life

Find us on:

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Do you ever feel trapped between going all-in (the constant go, go, go, go), or needing to check out (the I've earned it, I've put in my time, I'm just I'm done.)

You are NOT alone.

The secret that no one tells us - there IS another option.

Society teaches us to push, push, push — in business, in relationships, in life — which works for awhile. Then we crash and burn, and all too often, that frustration turns inward. Well, there’s good news, in today’s episode, Stephanie and Maren share an alternative path. They unpack one of the most overlooked leadership skills: the difference between presence and pressure.

• Why does our culture reward relentless doing while quietly starving the roots that sustain us?
• What does it actually look like to slow down without checking out?

Stephanie and Maren tackle these questions, and more, through real stories, honest reflection, and a few unexpected analogies (think: scuba diving, lawnmowers, and Will Smith). The "go-go-go then crash" cycle is real and this conversation will give you tools to not end up as just another statistic.

Tangible, actionable practices will help you shift out of the all-or-nothing loop, reconnect you to what you love and help you find actual fulfillment in your life.

If you've ever felt like you're running on empty yet can't seem to stop, this episode is for you.---

Resources & References Mentioned

17:14 - Collateral Beauty (2016) — starring Will Smith, Kate Winslet, Helen Mirren

- https://amzn.to/4mODUja

22:10 - Rumi — "Meet it at the doorway" reference

21:06 & 27:00 - Saint Francis of Assisi — the practice of giving inward first, then to a stranger

Enjoyed This Episode?

If this resonated with you, the best thing you can do is **share it with someone who needs it** — and leave us a review on Apple Podcasts. It helps more soulful leaders find their way to this conversation.

---

“You cannot give somebody what you think they need. You can only give yourself what you need.” — Stephanie Allen

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TRANSCRIPT

YouTube Video

Love this episode? Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts—it helps other soulful leaders find us!

Have a question or topic suggestion? We'd love to hear from you. Reach out through our website or social media.

📬 Connect With Us
Website: www.TheSoulfulLeaderPodcast.com
Main Website: www.tslp.life

Find us on:

• YouTube: @soulfulleaders
• LinkedIn: The Soulful Leaders
• Facebook: The Soulful Leaders

Newsletter: Get our weekly newsletter 'Shift Happens' with tips, tricks, and insights to uplevel your life and leadership, plus notifications of new podcast releases and blog posts. Sign up at www.tslp.life

You did everything right. You climbed the mountain, hit the milestones, checked all the boxes — and then you got there and thought... is this really it?

That quiet emptiness at the top of success is something nobody warns you about. In this episode, Stephanie and Maren get honest about why achieving your goals can feel like the loneliest moment of your life — and what's actually missing. Spoiler: it's not another goal. It's the inner work that most of us were never taught to do.

From Alex Hormozi's "apathy problem" to the woman who thought her gift was numbers (it wasn't), this conversation will have you rethinking what success actually means — and how to make it feel as good on the inside as it looks on the outside.

Key Takeaways

• Success can feel empty when it's built on someone else's prescription. When we follow the "right house, right car, right job" formula without checking in with our own longings, we arrive at the top of a mountain that was never ours to climb.
• Your gifts and your skills are not the same thing. You may have built skills to survive or fit in — but your true gifts are the things that come so naturally you've probably dismissed them entirely.
• Your inner world creates your outer reality. Most of us are unconsciously running on autopilot. Pausing to ask what do I actually need? — emotionally, mentally, spiritually — changes everything.
• Identity is not static. Who you are right now doesn't have to be who you stay. Growth requires updating the story you tell yourself about yourself.
• Simple practices create profound shifts. Evening journaling, flow writing, asking better questions — these aren't soft extras. They're how you access the magic that your conscious mind filters out.

Referenced in This Episode

- Alex Hormozi — entrepreneur and investor who openly discussed his "apathy problem" after achieving significant outer success

- Vicki Keith (Ep. 150) — Neurodiversity is Your Superpower (https://thesoulfulleaderpodcast.com/2024/05/28/150-neurodiversity-is-your-superpower-with-vicki-keith/) — referenced in the conversation around ADHD as a gift, not a deficit

- Morning Pages / Flow Writing — a journaling practice (popularized by Julia Cameron's *The Artist's Way*) that Maren uses as evening pages to access subconscious insight

TRANSCRIPT

YouTube Video

Love this episode? Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts—it helps other soulful leaders find us!

Have a question or topic suggestion? We'd love to hear from you. Reach out through our website or social media.

📬 Connect With Us
Website: www.TheSoulfulLeaderPodcast.com
Main Website: www.tslp.life

Find us on:

• YouTube: @soulfulleaders
• LinkedIn: The Soulful Leaders
• Facebook: The Soulful Leaders

Newsletter: Get our weekly newsletter 'Shift Happens' with tips, tricks, and insights to uplevel your life and leadership, plus notifications of new podcast releases and blog posts. Sign up at www.tslp.life

Are you playing to win, or just playing not to lose?

There's a mindset that is quietly shaping your life...

Watching the Olympics this year got us thinking — not just about athletic excellence, but about the mindset behind it. Do you want to win because you've pushed yourself to your absolute best? Or do you want to win simply because everyone else fell short

In this episode, Stephanie and Maren dive deep into the difference between a fixed mindset and a growth mindset — and how this one distinction is quietly shaping your relationships, your business, your leadership, and your life

Spoiler: it's not an all-or-nothing thing. We all have both. The real question is — where is each one showing up for you?

🎧 What You'll Take Away

• Why the process matters more than the outcome — and what Carol Dweck's groundbreaking research with children reveals about how we're wired for (or against) growth
• The hidden cost of a disposable mindset — in business, in relationships, and in how we lead others
• How to find your exemplars — and why surrounding yourself with people who call you up is the secret to true excellence
• The snowboard principle — what relaxing your shoulders has to do with resilience in business and life
• Why what frustrates you about the world might be your unique fingerprint — and the invitation to up-level that very field

"Be kind with the self you're becoming — because you haven't become that person yet. You're in the making." — Stephanie

📚 Resources Mentioned

• Mindset: The New Psychology of Success by Carol Dweck — Find it on Amazon
• Nadia Comaneci — the 1976 Olympic gymnast who scored the first perfect 10 and up-leveled the entire sport of gymnastics

🙌 We Want to Hear From You!

What area of your life are you ready to up-level? What does the world need — and could you be the one to help with that?

Watch on YouTube

TRANSCRIPT

Love this episode? Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts—it helps other soulful leaders find us!

Have a question or topic suggestion? We'd love to hear from you. Reach out through our website or social media.

📬 Connect With Us
Website: www.TheSoulfulLeaderPodcast.com
Main Website: www.tslp.life

Find us on:

• YouTube: @soulfulleaders
• LinkedIn: The Soulful Leaders
• Facebook: The Soulful Leaders

Newsletter: Get our weekly newsletter 'Shift Happens' with tips, tricks, and insights to uplevel your life and leadership, plus notifications of new podcast releases and blog posts. Sign up at www.tslp.life

Feeling stuck on the inside while life keeps rolling by?
You're not alone—and you might be looking in the wrong place for answers.

In this episode, Stephanie and Maren dive into why we feel so powerless when we focus only on the outer world, and how real transformation happens when we turn inward. They explore the connection between our physical symptoms and emotional stuffing, why nobody wants to deal with emotions and how learning to do some simple inner work is the key to creating the empowered life you actually want.

Do you push down feelings, stay busy to avoid discomfort, or wonder why your body keeps breaking down despite "doing all the right things?" Then this episode is for you, it will shift how you see everything.

Key Takeaways

• Your symptoms aren't the problem—they're the messenger. That shoulder pain, upset stomach, or chronic headache? Look elsewhere for the cause.
• We've been taught to ignore our emotions, and it's literally making us sick. When we stuff our feelings, they don't disappear—they manifest in our bodies and our lives.
• The "beach ball effect": You can only hold so many emotions underwater before they start popping up uncontrollably, often hurting yourself or others.
• Emotions are your power center. They're the energy that weaves together body, mind, and soul—and they're essential for manifesting what you want.
• Pick your uncomfortable. Feeling emotions now is uncomfortable. Divorce, migraines, and cancer are also uncomfortable. Choose wisely.
• Create space with your emotions. Instead of "I'm angry," try "A part of me is experiencing anger." This simple shift gives you power to respond differently.

Until next time, remember: the answers you're looking for aren't out there—they're already within you.

➡️ Related Episode: #196 "Pick Your Hard" (go back and listen!)

TRANSCRIPT

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Love this episode? Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts—it helps other soulful leaders find us!

Have a question or topic suggestion? We'd love to hear from you. Reach out through our website or social media.

📬 Connect With Us
Website: www.TheSoulfulLeaderPodcast.com
Main Website: www.tslp.life

Find us on:

• YouTube: @soulfulleaders
• LinkedIn: The Soulful Leaders
• Facebook: The Soulful Leaders

Newsletter: Get our weekly newsletter 'Shift Happens' with tips, tricks, and insights to uplevel your life and leadership, plus notifications of new podcast releases and blog posts. Sign up at www.tslp.life

Ready to trade your inner ‘itty bitty shitty committee’ for a better compass: alignment?

The Soulful Leader Team sits down for a candid year-in-review where they share how they have shifted their own lives and identities - and they’ve turned small practices into meaningful change.

Dave shares how producing our show became his deep practice: spacing out work to absorb insights in layers, and then applying them when life got loud.

Lori reframes leadership where it’s most personal: at home. By shifting from fixing to leading, she completely changed the relationship with her adult daughter.

Angela shares how much she has noticed the social norms that nudge her toward unconscious choices and the tough skill of sitting with her own thoughts. She is choosing joy over quick-hit fun and finding what truly nourishes.

If you’ve ever felt stuck in everyday patterns (like scrolling), are interested in reclaiming hours in your day, or you’re craving less numb and more meaning - this podcast is for you.

Learn practical, human ways toward aligned choices, one practice at a time.

If this resonates, follow the show, share it with a friend who’s seeking traction, and leave a review with one aligned practice you’re starting this week.

TRANSCRIPT

YouTube Video

Love this episode? Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts—it helps other soulful leaders find us!

Have a question or topic suggestion? We'd love to hear from you. Reach out through our website or social media.

📬 Connect With Us
Website: www.TheSoulfulLeaderPodcast.com
Main Website: www.tslp.life

Find us on:

• YouTube: @soulfulleaders
• LinkedIn: The Soulful Leaders
• Facebook: The Soulful Leaders

Newsletter: Get our weekly newsletter 'Shift Happens' with tips, tricks, and insights to uplevel your life and leadership, plus notifications of new podcast releases and blog posts. Sign up at www.tslp.life

Your morning route, the layout of a room and even the items on your desk quietly decide who you are each day.

That means they can also help you when you want to change.

This week, Maren & Stephanie dig into the hidden script behind habits and show how small environmental edits, supportive community, and gentle inner work help you change old habits, stick to new ones and achieve the things you want that have been just out of reach.

Instead of forcing goals with sheer willpower, they unpack why we often get pulled back into old patterns after the initial rush of change, and how to interrupt that without shame.

With their normal combination of stories, humor and user-friendly tools, they explore how to flip the script on habits while also transforming doubt and fear, fostering inner respect, and finally getting that thing that has been just out of reach.

Expect practical tools you can use today—room resets that trigger awareness, accountability that reduces decision fatigue, and small rituals to increase both attention and energy.

🙌 If this resonates, hit play, then rearrange one small piece of your life for an upgrade.

✍️ Subscribe for more soulful strategy, share this with someone ready to hack a habit, and leave a review to help others find the show.

❣️ What’s the first change you’ll make this week?

TRANSCRIPT

YouTube Video

Love this episode? Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts—it helps other soulful leaders find us!

Have a question or topic suggestion? We'd love to hear from you. Reach out through our website or social media.

📬 Connect With Us
Website: www.TheSoulfulLeaderPodcast.com
Main Website: www.tslp.life

Find us on:

• YouTube: @soulfulleaders
• LinkedIn: The Soulful Leaders
• Facebook: The Soulful Leaders

Newsletter: Get our weekly newsletter 'Shift Happens' with tips, tricks, and insights to uplevel your life and leadership, plus notifications of new podcast releases and blog posts. Sign up at www.tslp.life

A reality check for overachievers and perfectionists who are tired of trying to “get it right.”

We’re a society of overachievers and perfectionists who keep trying to “get it right.” We've been taught that the solution is ‘fixing outcomes’, yet we’ve tried that -over and over again, and it’s still not working.

The real path to what you want?

It’s expanding your identity and capacity. And that’s great news because you can change you.

Today, Stephanie and Maren unpack this path from the perspective of hidden fears, how we sabotage our goals and resolutions and the beliefs keeping us stuck. Instead of guarding a fragile plan, they walk you through building capacity. Instead of white-knuckling toward outcomes, they share how to build skills that keep momentum alive without burning out.

Today they get real about:

• fear of responsibility blocking goals
• reframing power as response-abilit
• receiving abundance without guilt
• spotting red flags and road signs
• life as a learnable, practical skil
• trust, discernment and guidance
• moving beyond shame and blame
• questions that keep momentum alive

From reframing blame and shame to noticing the cost of avoidance in the body, you’ll find tools to build a clearer, truly joyfilled life.

If you’re ready to trade either-or thinking for powerful choices, this conversation will meet you where you are and expand what you believe is possible.

If this resonates, follow the show, share with a friend who’s stuck between fear and growth, and leave a quick review so more people can find conversations like this.

➡️ Your next step is simple: choose one skill to practice this week and tell us how it goes.

TRANSCRIPT

YouTube Video

Love this episode? Rate and review us on Apple Podcasts—it helps other soulful leaders find us!

Have a question or topic suggestion? We'd love to hear from you. Reach out through our website or social media.

📬 Connect With Us
Website: www.TheSoulfulLeaderPodcast.com
Main Website: www.tslp.life

Find us on:

• YouTube: @soulfulleaders
• LinkedIn: The Soulful Leaders
• Facebook: The Soulful Leaders

Newsletter: Get our weekly newsletter 'Shift Happens' with tips, tricks, and insights to uplevel your life and leadership, plus notifications of new podcast releases and blog posts. Sign up at www.tslp.life