Sometimes in grief, you feel like you're doing better.

You're getting through the day. You're sleeping more. Maybe you've started to reconnect with parts of your life again.

And then, out of nowhere, a wave hits.

It can feel like you're right back where you started.

In this episode of the Mindfulness & Grief Podcast, Heather Stang and Amanda Palermo explore Step 5 of the Mindfulness & Grief System: Getting Unstuck.

This step speaks to that common experience of feeling stuck in grief, and gently reframes it. Because most of the time, you're not actually stuck. You're moving through a process that is not linear, predictable, or easy.

Heather and Amanda talk about the "boomerang" nature of grief, why waves come back even when you thought you were doing better, and how the belief that you should be progressing can add another layer of suffering.

They also share practical ways to shift your perspective, including working with the five mental hindrances, expressive arts, and journaling practices that help create movement when things feel heavy or stuck.

You will learn:

• Why grief can feel like it's going backward
• What "being stuck" in grief really means
• How to shift your perspective when nothing seems to change
• The five mental hindrances and how they show up in grief
• How expressive arts can help release what feels stuck
• A powerful journaling practice using different points of view
• Why "appreciation" may feel more supportive than gratitude in grief

This episode is not about fixing your grief or forcing progress.

It is about understanding your experience in a new way, and creating space for movement, even when things feel stuck.

If you've ever thought, "I was doing so well, why does this feel so hard again?" this conversation is for you.

🧘 Timestamps:

00:00 Feeling "stuck" in grief
01:30 The boomerang metaphor
03:15 "But I was doing so well"
05:00 Why grief isn't linear
07:30 The myth of progress in grief
10:00 Acceptance vs fighting the process
13:00 Tasks of mourning vs stages of grief
16:00 What it really means to get unstuck
18:30 The five mental hindrances
22:00 Longing, resistance, and anxiety
26:00 Exhaustion and doubt in grief
30:00 The yoga philosophy perspective
33:00 Grief as energy that needs to move
36:30 Seasons of grief
40:00 Expressive arts and grief landscapes
45:00 Amanda's canvas practice
52:00 Releasing what feels stuck
56:00 Journaling from different perspectives
1:02:00 Writing from a compassionate voice
1:06:00 Appreciation vs gratitude
1:10:00 Closing reflections

Resources and links:

🌿 Full show notes:
https://heatherstang.com/podcast/

💜 Join Awaken Grief Support (Free 14-day trial):
https://heatherstang.com/grief-group/

🎓 Mindfulness & Grief Coach Certification:
https://heatherstang.com/mindfulness-grief-coach-certification/

🎥 Free Living With Grief Workshop:
https://heatherstang.com/living-with-grief-workshop/

When grief brings up difficult emotions, it can be hard to know what to do next. Do you lean in? Do you step back? Do you let yourself cry, or do you take a break from the intensity?

In this episode of the Mindfulness & Grief Podcast, Heather Stang and Amanda Palermo explore how to tend to difficult emotions with more wisdom, discernment, and care.

This is Step 4 of the Mindfulness & Grief System: Skillful Courage.

Skillful courage in grief is not about force or fearlessness. It is about learning how to listen to yourself, knowing when to approach what hurts, and knowing when to rest. Heather and Amanda talk about the pressure to "be strong," the fear of being overwhelmed by grief, and why vulnerability is not weakness. They also explore how grief can show up in many forms, from crying and anger to numbness, confusion, and withdrawal.

You will learn:

• What skillful courage means in grief
• Why difficult emotions are not the enemy
• How to discern when to lean in and when to step back
• The difference between intuitive and instrumental grieving styles
• Why being called "strong" can sometimes feel like pressure
• How the RAIN practice can help during a grief wave
• A mindful movement practice for vulnerability and strength
• A journaling prompt to help you reconnect with your inner courage

This episode is not about pushing through grief. It is about learning how to be with what hurts in a way that is honest, grounded, and kind.

If grief has been feeling overwhelming, or if you are unsure how to respond when difficult emotions arise, this is a gentle place to begin.

🧘 Timestamps:

00:00 Step 4: Skillful Courage
01:35 What this step is really about
03:20 Learning when to lean in and when to step back
05:10 Trusting your own experience in grief
08:00 Making space to cry, or not
10:25 The fear of being overwhelmed
13:10 Grief is more than tears
16:05 The many emotions inside grief
19:45 Feelings as messengers, not enemies
22:20 Intuitive and instrumental grieving
28:10 Moving the energy of grief
31:40 The pressure to be strong
36:25 Vulnerability and courage
40:05 Discernment and inner wisdom
45:15 The RAIN practice
52:40 Using RAIN in everyday life
57:30 Dancing with strength and vulnerability
1:03:15 A journaling prompt for courage
1:07:20 Strength, resilience, and rest

Full show notes and resources:
https://heatherstang.com/podcast/

Connect with Amanda on Instagram:
https://instagram.com/amandapalermo1018

Work with Heather

💜 Try Awaken Grief Support Free for 14 Days
Live support, guided practices, and community for people living with grief.
https://heatherstang.com/grief-group/

🎥 Free Living With Grief Workshop and Live Q&A With Heather
A gentle introduction to mindfulness-based grief support with time for questions.
https://heatherstang.com/living-with-grief-workshop/

🎓 Mindfulness & Grief Coach Certification
Professional training for helpers who want to support others through grief while caring for themselves.
https://heatherstang.com/mindfulness-grief-coach-certification/

When grief softens the initial shock, other feelings often rise to the surface. In this episode of the Mindfulness & Grief Podcast, Heather Stang and Amanda Palermo explore how compassion can support you when grief brings guilt, self-criticism, resentment, and the pain of being human.

Grief does not only break the heart open. It can also make us hard on ourselves. You may judge your emotions, question your reactions, or feel guilty for what you did, did not do, or even for what you feel now. Heather and Amanda talk honestly about how common that is, especially when grief affects family dynamics and old wounds begin to surface.

This is Step 3 of the Mindfulness & Grief System: Compassion for All.

Compassion in grief is not about fixing pain, pretending everything is okay, or forcing yourself to be positive. It is about recognizing suffering and responding with care. That includes care for yourself, care for difficult people, and care for the grieving heart that may feel raw, overwhelmed, or alone.

Heather and Amanda explore the difference between empathy, sympathy, pity, and compassion. They talk about the role of self-compassion in grief, the healing power of common humanity, and how simple practices like a hand on the heart, a compassionate mantra, or metta meditation can help soften shame and self-judgment.

You will learn:

• Why grief can trigger guilt, resentment, and self-criticism
• The difference between empathy, sympathy, pity, and compassion
• How self-compassion includes an active response of care
• What Kristin Neff's three elements of compassion look like in grief
• Why common humanity can ease isolation
• How to create a self-compassion mantra that feels true
• What metta meditation is and how it supports compassion for self and others
• Why compassion is not the same as excusing harmful behavior

This episode is not about getting over grief. It is not about rescuing yourself from pain. It is about learning how to meet your grief, and yourself, with kindness.

If you have been feeling hard on yourself after loss, this is a gentle place to begin.

🧘 Timestamps:

00:00 There Is One Thing That Is Not Impermanent
00:49 Step 3: Compassion for All
02:54 Guilt, Old Wounds, and Unexpected Feelings
05:02 Family Tension and Resentment in Grief
06:36 Empathy, Sympathy, Pity, and Compassion
08:51 "I'm Human, and I'm Doing My Best"
11:24 Self-Care as Compassion in Action
12:06 "I Should Be Over This By Now"
15:04 What Do You Need in This Moment?
17:14 Kristin Neff's Three Elements of Compassion
18:25 Common Humanity and Not Feeling Alone
20:07 Self-Kindness in the Midst of Grief
23:25 Why Grief Groups Can Be So Healing
25:06 Creating Your Own Self-Compassion Mantra
26:15 "This Feeling Isn't Permanent"
27:36 What Compassion Is Not
30:42 Taking Care of Her Daughter
34:31 Compassion for Difficult People
36:01 Metta Meditation Explained
41:23 Adapting the Practice So It Does Not Cause More Suffering
44:55 "I'm Having a Hard Time"
45:35 "I'm Feeling Grief"
47:34 A Preview of Step 4: Vulnerability and Courage

Full show notes and resources:
https://heatherstang.com/podcast/

Connect with Amanda on Instagram:
https://instagram.com/amandapalermo1018

Work with Heather

💜 Try Awaken Grief Support Free for 14 Days
Live support, guided practices, and community for people living with grief.
https://heatherstang.com/grief-group/

🎥 Free Living With Grief Workshop and Live Q&A With Heather
A gentle introduction to mindfulness-based grief support with time for questions.
https://heatherstang.com/living-with-grief-workshop/

🎓 Mindfulness & Grief Coach Certification
Professional training for helpers who want to support others through grief while caring for themselves.
https://heatherstang.com/mindfulness-grief-coach-certification/