It’s another week of Married. Single. Divorced., and we’re all slowly melting in the heatwave while somehow finding ourselves discussing camping, scuba diving, car thefts and Costa Coffee crime investigations.

The Catch-Up ☀️

🥵 First things first: we are all absolutely feeling the heat.

🏕️ Fern has been living her best camping life. Despite briefly considering packing dumbbells for the trip (because apparently camping isn’t hard enough), she successfully hand-inflated her tent like it was 1997.

Luckily, she dodged the super storm and was rewarded with:

🔥 Campfires every night 🍡 “Mashmallows” roasted to perfection 👧 All the kids getting on beautifully 💦 And even a leap into the waterfalls

🌿 Larissa talks of finding algae in unexpected places (yes, the boobs) 👂 Water dribbling out of her ears for days 😰 And a healthy dose of nightly panic

Back on land, the house saga continues.

🏡 The kitchen is finally in. The utility room, however, has chosen violence.

We are pleased to announce:

🥂 Housewarming party: end of July.

Current plan? Bring your own chair.

💇‍♀️ Charlotte’s week has been a bit of a mixed bag.

She’s been dancing twice, had a fresh trim and enjoyed lunch at her favourite restaurant in Chorlton. Lovely. Then things escalated...

The Great Car Chase 🚔

Charlotte shares the absolutely insane story of her sister Alex’s car being stolen.

🚐 Next thing she’s tearing through the streets in a nightie and wellies, jumping into Dexter’s van to give chase.

The thieves clearly hadn’t planned for Alex.

At one point she’s racing after them shouting:

📍 “THE FUCKING CAR’S TRACKED!”

The police are involved.

Dexter’s dad joins the investigation.

Everyone is suddenly part of a Fast & Furious remake set in suburbia.

Meanwhile…

😴 Charlotte hears absolutely none of it and remains completely dead to the world.

The good news?

🚗 The car was found.

Alex remains understandably furious.

🚘 Charlotte also admits that if someone stole her battered Astra, it might actually solve a few problems.

Enter: Tea Leaf Tony

The thief in question?

👤 Tea Leaf Tony.

Unfortunately for Tony, none of the stolen items were worth anything.

💬 “Tony, you robbed my van last night.”

💬 “Don’t do it again Tony.”

💬 “I can’t flog it.”

An unusually polite crime story.

Robbery Stories We Somehow End Up Sharing

😳 Fern recalls being mugged and immediately handing everything over.

No heroics. No chase.

Just: 👉 “Here you go.”

Which, to be fair, feels sensible.

☕ Meanwhile Mike once believed he’d been robbed in town.

His phone had disappeared.

He urgently asked Larissa to lock it.

Location found:

📍 Costa Coffee.

The issue?

💬 “Mike wouldn’t go to Costa Coffee.”

Turns out… his phone would.

A chaotic episode featuring camping adventures, underwater panic attacks, police chases, Tea Leaf Tony and the ongoing miracle that Larissa’s house is nearly habitable.

As always, expect belly laughs, oversharing and proof that normal weeks simply don’t exist in our lives.

Follow, rate 5⭐️, and share with your besties - especially if you’ve ever chased car thieves in a nightie.

📲 Find us on socials:

Instagram → @married.single.divorced

TikTok → @msdthepod

It’s another week of Married. Single. Divorced., and between rewires, resignations and rogue pyramid schemes, we’ve somehow ended up discussing ghosts, reincarnation and door-to-door sponge sales.

The Catch-Up ☕️

🔌 Fern is temporarily homeless. Her house is currently being rewired, meaning floors are up, cables are everywhere, and chaos reigns supreme. The electrician has managed to open the infamous broken window. The question now is: 👉 Will he fix it? 👉 Or will Fern be left with a permanently open window and a strong breeze? Place your bets.

🏡 Larissa’s house is finally starting to look like an actual house.

The kitchen has arrived, the floor screed is down, and after months of dust, delays and despair, things are finally… housing. 🎉 Dare we say it… Housewarming party this summer?!

💼 Charlotte has QUIT HER JOB. After a whirlwind experience she’s learned two important life lessons: We don’t sell peas. 🌱 The grass isn’t always greener.

Charlotte is embracing her next chapter and has already moved on to her next project: Finding Fern a man. Current front-runner? 👨‍🍳 The chef.

This Week’s Topic: Do We Believe in Ghosts? 👻

A simple question that spirals rapidly.

👻 Charlotte is a firm no on ghosts.

But reincarnation? That’s where things get interesting.

She often finds herself wondering:

👉 “What have I done in a previous life to deserve this?” 😂

🤔 Larissa isn’t entirely sure what she believes.

As a child she was convinced ghosts existed…

…although looking back, was it actually ghosts she was afraid of? Or just burglars?

💭 Fern doesn’t love the idea that there’s simply nothing after we die.

She isn’t convinced about ghosts, but she’s not convinced there isn’t something either.

⚖️ Which leads us to one of the internet’s most bizarre theories…

Have you heard about people supposedly becoming lighter when they die because their soul leaves their body? We have questions. Lots of questions.

✨ Do we believe in an afterlife? ☁️ What happens when we die? “I can see them falling from heaven”?

Larissa shares one of the greatest cautionary tales of her youth.

📈 A pyramid scheme. 📍 Great Yarmouth. 🚨 High-vis jackets. 👠 Bleeding heels. 📵 No phone data.

Honestly, it sounds less like a business opportunity and more like a hostage situation. 😂

🎬 Fern narrowly avoided a job with LoveFilm, thanks to her parents stepping in and helping her see sense.

💡 And not to be left out, Charlotte had an interview for a pyramid-style scheme in Australia… selling light bulbs.

Because apparently none of us can resist a terrible opportunity.

Important Questions We Need Answering…

🧽 Did anyone else have door-to-door salesmen trying to sell sponges?

👻 Are ghosts real?

🔮 Is reincarnation a thing?

👨‍🍳 And should Fern give the chef a chance?

A completely random episode featuring afterlife theories, career changes, house renovations, terrible business decisions and a window that may never close again.

Basically, classic us.

Follow, rate 5⭐️, and share with your besties - especially the ones who once got trapped in a pyramid scheme and are still pretending it was a business venture.

📲 Find us on socials:

Instagram → @married.single.divorced

TikTok → @msdthepod

It’s another week of Married. Single. Divorced., and we’re discussing care home scandals, algorithm confessions and whether anyone actually knows what the archive button is for.

The Catch-Up ☕️

💩 Larissa is officially wading through shit. House renovations have hit the point where the balloons have popped and the novelty has worn off, She escaped for a mini-break to Valencia, but after walking around in the rain, she was left feeling a little underwhelmed.

💃 Charlotte has been dancing in a dress that may have been slightly shorter than intended. She’s also been back at college, where people are apparently checking pedestrian crossing buttons for needles. If you know, you know. The listeners remain shooketh.

👵 Fern’s grandad has been causing chaos at the care home, having been caught in a lady’s room. We don’t know the full story, but we support his commitment to keeping life interesting. Fern has also enjoyed a trip to the beach, some boating adventures, and a healthy session on the 2p machines. Her dad hit the token jackpot and honestly, we couldn’t be happier for him.

🎙️ We also decide it’s time to organise a pod beach day.

This Week’s Topic: What’s On Your Algorithm? 📱

We take a deep dive into the weird and wonderful corners of our social media feeds.

💇‍♂️ Fern’s algorithm is serving up videos of men getting toupees fitted. A niche but fascinating rabbit hole.

💁‍♀️ Charlotte’s feed is full of curly hair transformations and somehow… Instagram palm readings.

🚬 Larissa’s algorithm consists largely of videos of crackheads turning their lives around. Inspirational content only.

Then Somehow We End Up Talking About Underwear…

As one does.

🩲 Where are we buying sexy underwear these days?

🩱 Charlotte reveals she wore thongs at school. Anti-VPL to her core.

🏋️‍♀️ We discuss gym fashion, thong-backed leggings, see-through activewear and whether some people are wearing leggings or simply painted-on confidence.

💬 tied up like a Christmas ham?

💬 they make you look like a bag of satsumas?

The debate continues.

😩 Fern has somehow lost a bra wire inside her washing machine, which raises another important question:

How long are we all keeping our bras?

A truly chaotic episode featuring social media rabbit holes, questionable underwear choices, care home gossip and more renovation misery.

Basically, exactly what you’ve come to expect.

Follow, rate 5⭐️, and share with your besties - especially if you’ve got 37,000 unread emails and no idea what the Archive button does.

📲 Find us on socials:

Instagram → @married.single.divorced

TikTok → @msdthepod