Tressa Bell introduces her podcast, The Fan in the Window:Interrupting What We Inherit, explaining how surgery created the stillness that led her to build a book, podcast, business, and platform rooted in her frustration that it took until age 50 to understand what happened to her at five.

In this episode, “The Grief of Losing a Role,” she explores howfamily-system roles formed in chaos become identity, and why stepping out of them brings grief, confusion, and relief at once. Sharing a childhood moment of learning her father wasn’t biological, she connects role-based identity tosurvival, nervous systems, and generational patterns. She reflects on smoothing over her mother’s deathbed apology, defines forgiveness as the absence of anger, and offers grounding, journaling prompts, and the idea that healing is“the accumulation of Tuesdays,” with a preview of an upcoming episode about mothers’ apologies.

Learn more at thefaninthewindow.com.Grab the book at http://www.amazon.com/author/tressalbell.

The podcast is available anywhere you listen, new episodes drop every Tuesday.

Follow Tressa on Instagram, Facebook, TikTok, and YouTube.

00:00 Why Now

01:26 Podcast Mission

01:45 Episode Setup

02:18 Listener Safety Note

03:18 Grieving A Role

04:20 The Girl At Window

05:55 When Roles Become Identity

06:52 What The Role Cost

08:23 Role Relief Begins

09:39 Grief Beyond Death

10:47 Mother Deathbed Moment

12:43 Redefining Forgiveness

14:31 Grief And Relief Together

16:01 Surviving Versus Healing

17:46 You Are Not Late

19:17 Weekly Reflection Prompt

20:26 Grounding Exercise

22:04 Healing Is Tuesdays

23:15 Next Episode And Resources

24:23 Closing Message

If you need support:In the United States, you can call or text 988 to reach theSuicide and Crisis Lifeline—available 24/7, free, and confidential. Outside the U.S., visit ⁠findahelpline.com⁠ for international mental‑health hotlines and crisis services in your region.

This didn’t start with you…but you can interrupt it!