We talk a lot about romantic relationships in queer spaces. But what about everything else?

In this episode of Queer Hearts Healthy Starts, OSTC therapists Kristen Crowe, LPCC, BC-DMT (they/them) and Raven Juergensen, APCC, ATR-BC (she/her) get into the queer social friendscape: what it actually takes to build meaningful friendships, why it's so much harder than anyone prepares you for, and what gets in the way for so many of us.

They dig into the pressure to make one person be everything, how cishet norms around friendship leave queer folks without a roadmap, what it means to find community when you've spent years masking, and how to start trusting your own nervous system to tell you who your people are.

This one is personal, practical, and deeply relatable. Especially if you've ever Googled how to make queer friends and meant it.

Sound Bites

"We need to let ourselves be nourished by each other in ways that aren't inherently romantic"

"No one teaches you how to have healthy friendships, you're just kind of thrown in the deep end"

"That's so much to put on one person"

"To share yourself with others, you have to know who you are first"

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 1: Sig Levin She/Her @twinhighmaintenancemachines

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 2: Joselyn Romero They Them @josyfeocy

Hosts’ Bio:

Kristen Crowe LPCC, BC-DMT, CST (they/them) Is Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, Board Certified Dance/Movement Therapist, Certified Sex Therapist, and Clinical Supervisor with Open Space Therapy Collective. Kristen specializes in working somatically with adults and partners to help heal the mind-body connection so you can feel more grounded and vibrant every day.

Raven Juergensen, APCC, ATR (she/her) is an Associate Professional Clinical Counselor and Registered Art Therapist. Raven works with teens, couples, and adults, drawing on creativity and geek culture to help clients process their internal experience and bring intuitive creativity into daily life.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Keywords: queer friendship, chosen family, community building, social isolation, attachment styles, cishet norms, decentering romance, queer social life, authentic self, code switching, nervous system, body awareness, ACT therapy, late bloomer, masking, intersectionality, mixed relationships, secure attachment, queer community, boundaries, communication, values, intuition, social landscape

The word "toxic" is everywhere. But what does it actually mean, and when does throwing it around start to work against us?

In this episode of Queer Hearts Healthy Starts, OSTC therapists Allison Smith, LCSW (she/they) and Ernesto Martinez, AMFT, APCC (he/they) get into the real definition: not just what's present in a harmful relationship, but what's missing. They break down the difference between genuine power and control dynamics and the everyday friction that comes with being in relationship with other humans. They talk about gaslighting, love bombing, isolation, and the ways that queer folks navigate all of this inside systems that were never designed to protect them.

This one goes deep, and it goes there with care.

Join us for the second episode in our Queer Hearts Health Starts: Breaking Toxic Relationship Patterns series.

Sound Bites:

"Confusion and inconsistency are really potent things that make us very driven and attached"

"To acknowledge something doesn't mean to endorse it"

"The person who loves me also hurts me"

"It's not just what is present, it's also what is missing"

"What was I left carrying that isn't mine"

"Our relationship with our government is an abusive relationship"

"We start in this world of secrecy and isolation"

"We're social creatures, we're made to be in a village"

"Try to invest in your friendships and your communities"

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 1: Asia Brooks - She/Her - @samuraiasia

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 2: Madi - She/Her - @clicksbymadi

Hosts Bio:

Allison Smith LCSW (she/they) is a Licensed Therapist at Open Space Therapy Collective. Allison specializes in integrating trauma-informed, abolitionist frameworks to support clients in exploring identity, relationships, and cultural connections.

Ernesto Martinez APCC, AMFT (they/elle/he/el) is an Associate Therapist with Open Space Therapy Collective. Ernesto specializes in working with Adults, Teens, & Parents of Gender Expansive Children, Adult Children of (im)Migrants to transform challenges into stepping stones towards self-compassion, fulfillment, and confidence.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Keywords: queer relationships, toxic relationships, intimate partner violence, power and control, emotional codependence, minority stress, attachment, gaslighting, love bombing, isolation, intergenerational trauma, healthy love, community care, LGBTQ+ relationships, heterocentric norms, systemic oppression, nervous system, repair, incompatibility, chosen family

Welcome to the series Queer Hearts Healthy Starts: Breaking Toxic Relationship Patterns!

Queer people know how to love hard. We also know how to stay too long, give too much, and call it devotion. In this intro episode of Queer Hearts Healthy Starts, OSTC therapist Terra Friedman, AMFT, opens the conversation we actually need to have — what makes a relationship toxic, where those patterns come from, and why queer folks carry more than most.

Terra breaks down the definition of toxic relationships (hint: it's about power and emotional codependence, not just bad vibes), traces the historical and systemic forces that shape how we love, and takes on the myths that paint queer relationships as inherently unstable or uniquely evolved. Spoiler: neither is true, and both do damage.

This one's the foundation. Tune in so the rest of the series lands the way it should.

Sound Bites

"Toxic relationships are based in power and emotional codependence"

"Systemic models of health are rooted in white, hetero, binary norms"

"Trauma and systemic stress influence relationship patterns"

Mentioned in this Episode: Evelyn Hooker - The Adjustment of the Male Overt Homosexual

My Therapist is Out! Can You Have Healthy Relationships If You Only Saw Toxic Ones

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 1: Fox Woods He/They @fox_kendall_woods

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 2: Bex She/Her @bexbourgeois

Host Bio : Terra Friedman AFMT (she/her) is an Associate Therapist with Open Space Therapy Collective. Terra specializes in working with high achieving womxn who experience anxiety. Terra also works with couples and partners who are currently in or exploring non-monogamous relationships.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Keywords: queer relationships, toxic relationships, mental health, community connection, systemic prejudice, healthy love, attachment, LGBTQ history

In Part One of this listener Q&A, hosts and therapists Renae Johnson (they/them) and Kristen Crowe (they/them) respond to questions from the My Therapist Is Out! community about identity-based harm and what it actually feels like to live inside it. Together, they unpack why so many queer and marginalized folks feel chronically exhausted, disconnected, or unsure whether what they’re carrying “counts” as trauma.

Renae and Kristen explore how identity-based harm shows up in the body, in relationships, and in community spaces — especially when those spaces don’t feel as safe or healing as we hoped. They talk about the tension between wanting connection and needing protection, how to support immigrant and targeted communities without centering ourselves, and what community care can look like when we’re already stretched thin. This episode offers validation, clarity, and permission to name what’s happening — without needing to have all the answers yet.

Takeaways

The conversation highlights the exhaustion felt by queer individuals in today's society.

Understanding the difference between personal trauma and collective trauma is crucial.

Community care plays a vital role in healing from identity-based harm.

Emotional responses can be complex and intertwined with societal issues.

It's important to recognize the impact of social media on our emotional well-being.

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 1: Charlie Montiel He/They @charlieboytattoo

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 2: Rae Hamilton-Vargo They/Them @rae_hv

Host Bios:

Kristen Crowe LPCC, BC-DMT (they/them) Is Licensed Therapist, Dance Therapist, and Clinical Supervisor with Open Space Therapy Collective. Kristen specializes in working somatically with adults and partners to help heal the mind-body connection so you can feel more grounded and vibrant every day.

Renae Johnson, LPCC, ATR-BC (they/them) is a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, Board-Certified Art Therapist, and the Founder of Open Space Therapy Collective, a group practice offering affirming, social justice-driven mental health care for the LGBTQ+ & QTPOC community.

In addition to their clinical work, Renae produces community wellness events like Queerly Connected and is a founding member of the LA Queer Coalition, creating spaces where queer and trans people can gather, heal, organize, and celebrate.

As a speaker, consultant, and activist, Renae is passionate about building systems of care that honor the full humanity of queer and trans individuals—and equipping healthcare and wellness providers with the tools to do the same.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Keywords: LGBTQ+ mental health podcast, identity-based harm, queer trauma and healing, community care in LGBTQ+ spaces, hate-based trauma recovery, radical healing for marginalized communities, queer therapists podcast, LGBTQ+ collective healing, trauma-informed community care, storytelling as healing in queer communities

In this episode of My Therapist Is Out!therapists Allison Smith (she/they) and Gio Nigro (they/them) dig into how identity-based harm—like microaggressions, cultural erasure, and systemic exclusion—shows up in LGBTQ+ lives and bodies. They explore why healing doesn’t happen in isolation, the role of therapy in reconnecting us to ourselves and each other, and how community care, mutual support, and shared vulnerability build real resilience. Through a lens that honors cultural heritage and generational strength, this conversation offers practical ways to move from disconnection toward belonging—without asking anyone to shrink, assimilate, or heal alone.

Takeaways

Identity-based harm encompasses violence, discrimination, and microaggressions.

Microaggressions can have a compounding effect on individuals' mental health.

Community support is crucial for healing from identity-based harm.

Therapy can help clients navigate the challenges of identity-based harm.

Building support systems is essential for mental well-being.

Connection with others can mitigate feelings of isolation.

Activism can foster a sense of community and belonging.

Cultural heritage plays a vital role in individual identity and resilience.

Vulnerability is necessary for building meaningful connections.

Practical steps can help individuals engage with their communities.

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 1: Clark He/Him @wondermountaincabin

Queer Moment of Joy Guest 2: Fafa She/Her

Host Bio:

Gio Nigro LCSW (they/them) is a Licensed Therapist with Open Space Therapy Collective. Gio specializes in working with queer adults and older adults who struggle to understand their identity and behaviors and who desire to gain confidence and release shame from their past experiences.

Allison Smith LCSW (she/they) is a Licensed Therapist at Open Space Therapy Collective. Allison specializes in integrating trauma-informed, abolitionist frameworks to support clients in exploring identity, relationships, and cultural connections.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Spotify: @MyTherapistisOut

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective

Keywords: identity-based harm, community care, microaggressions, lgbtq herapy, queer support systems, activism, cultural heritage, generational strength, connection, vulnerability

Renae Johnson (they/them) sits down with Jose Rosario (he/him) of Phoenix Empowered for a powerful conversation about identity, storytelling, and mental health as pathways to collective healing. Jose shares his lived experience as a queer Latino man with a disability and how storytelling has become both a personal and political act—one that resists erasure, challenges identity-based harm, and creates space for radical healing. Together, they explore how hate-based trauma and systemic oppression show up in the body and mind, why representation in mental health is necessary but not enough, and how community care and cultural practices can foster real empowerment. This conversation names anxiety not as a personal flaw, but as a rational response to ongoing threats, and invites listeners to engage in community, storytelling, and advocacy as acts of resistance and care. Through the lens of Phoenix Empowered, Renae and Jose remind us that healing doesn’t happen in isolation—it happens when we are seen, heard, and held in community.

Takeaways

Storytelling is a powerful tool for healing.

Identity-based harm includes various forms of violence, not just physical.

Representation in mental health is crucial but not sufficient.

Community support is essential for healing and empowerment.

Radical healing involves understanding systemic oppression.

Cultural practices play a significant role in healing.

Anxiety can be a response to systemic threats.

Engagement in community can be a form of resistance.

Phoenix Empowered aims to amplify marginalized voices.

Mentioned in this Episode: Jose’s Ted Talk

Queer Moment of Joy

Guest 1: Harley He/They @bb.musicstudio

Guest 2: Shauna She/Her @palsbarla

Guest Bio :

José Rosario is a mental health activist, researcher, and clinician and founder of The Phoenix Empowered, a nonprofit that helps organizations develop culturally-informed mental and social health protocols. José’s lived experience as a gay, Latino person who uses a wheelchair has informed both his clinical practice and his consulting work with organizations such as Home Depot, DoorDash, Shell and Johnson & Johnson.

José has spoken at TEDx, Washington State University, University of California Irvine, Arizona State University, ATOP MeaningfulWorld United Nations Affiliate Org, and the National Association of Councils for Developmental Disabilities, among many others.

He has served as an American Psychological Association (APA) Interdisciplinary Minority Fellow and is an active member of the APA’s Division of Trauma Psychology Policy and Anti-Oppression Committees. He also serves on the Community Advisory Board for the Rhode Island Attorney General’s Office and the Congressional Advisory Board for former Congressman James Langevin. He has been honored with the Chris Martin Humanitarian Award and the Victoria Lederberg Award for Excellence in Psychology.

Host Bio:

Renae Johnson, LPCC, ATR-BC (they/them) is a Licensed Professional Clinical Counselor, Board-Certified Art Therapist, and the Founder of Open Space Therapy Collective, a group practice offering affirming, social justice-driven mental health care for the LGBTQ+ & QTPOC community. With clinical expertise in complex trauma, identity development, and creative expression, Renae blends therapeutic depth with a commitment to equity and inclusion.

Renae produces community wellness events like Queerly Connected and is a founding member of the LA Queer Coalition, creating spaces where queer and trans people can gather, heal, organize, and celebrate.

As a speaker, consultant, and activist, Renae is passionate about building systems of care that honor the full humanity of queer and trans individuals—and equipping healthcare and wellness providers with the tools to do the same.

To find more from us visit:

Website: https://www.openspacetherapycollective.com

Instagram: @openspacetherapycollective

TikTok: @openspacetherapy

Apple Podcasts: @mytherapistisout

YouTube: @openspacetherapycollective