Carbon is like purpose.

The chemical backbone of all known life, carbon is the fourth most abundant element in the universe and the second most abundant in your body. It forms more compounds than all other elements combined.

Carbon creates diamonds -- and pencils. Both have worth, but not equal value. Our purposes are similar.

In the "You're in the People Business," series, I've used the six essential chemical elements for physical life to demonstrate the six vital elements of the inner life. I've covered:

1. Empathy (oxygen)
2. Repair (sulfur)
3. Expectations (phosphorus)
4. Curiosity (hydrogen)
5. Identity (nitrogen)

Today's episode is about Purpose (carbon).

Purpose is a backbone, not a bonus. Purpose is not a luxury but the framework everything else is dependent on. All purposes are not created equal. Some are diamond and others are pencils. The difference is how it's connected — and the pressure it undergoes.

The same is true for people. Purpose forged under pressure, properly connected to others, produces something extraordinary.

Purpose decays by default. We use carbon dating to measure how alive or dead something is. Purpose works the same way — left unattended, it deteriorates. It doesn't grow on its own. It requires intention.

Purpose operates on two levels:

1. Big meaning — the universal "why" that applies to everyone

2. Small meaning — the specific "why" that applies uniquely to you

Purpose isn't required to survive — people survive all the time without it. We keep taking the next step, hitting the next milestone, staying busy. But to truly thrive, purpose is non-negotiable. Its absence is easy to avoid confronting, which is exactly why so many people never do.

This Week's Challenge

• Where has purpose been quietly decaying in your life — in your work, relationships, or sense of self?

• Can you articulate both levels: the big meaning that connects you to others, and the specific meaning that is uniquely yours?

• What pressure in your life might actually be forming something valuable, if you stay connected to purpose through it?

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Nike's swoosh and Apple's logo are worth billions not because of their design, but because those companies intentionally created, promoted, and protected them. You have a brand too — as an individual, a family, a team, an organization. The question is whether you're being intentional about it.

In Part 5 of the "You're in the People Business" series, I explore how individualism weakens identity and how independence has been confused with maturity. True maturity is recognizing we are interdependent by design. Strong identity is never formed in isolation — it's realized in the context of belonging to something larger than ourselves.

The other extreme is just as damaging. Australia's "tall poppy syndrome" and Germany's prioritization of uniformity over individuality show what happens when the pendulum swings too far the other way. The goal is balance: individual expression and corporate belonging.

Three ways identity is shaped:

1. Words — what we say about ourselves and others
2. Values — stated clearly, not assumed. "We tell the truth" as a family value forges character in a way "don't lie" never will.
3. Actions — showing up, helping others, being present. Name these actions out loud, especially with kids. The phrases eventually become part of who they are.

This Week's Challenge

Audit your brand. Ask yourself:

• What words about yourself or others need to be retired — and what truthful words should replace them?
• What values does your family, team, or organization hold that have never been spoken out loud?
• What actions do you need to start, continue, or stop to align with the identity you want to build?

Visit Stephanie Presents for resources, to book speaking engagements, and get the weekly newsletter, Godly Impact.

Click here to order your copy of The Great Brain Remodel of Adolescence or purchase from Amazon

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Hydrogen is the lightest, most abundant element in the universe — and the force behind nuclear fusion in the sun. In Part 4 of the "You're in the People Business" series, I explore hydrogen's relational equivalent: curiosity.

First come the questions we ask ourselves. We only develop self-awareness to the degree we ask ourselves honest, deep questions — and answer them at the base level. Stopping at surface-level observations ("I won't do that again") without understanding why only increases the chance of repeating the pattern.

Knowing and being known is complicated. We have a pushmi-pullyu relationship with self-knowledge and vulnerability — drawn toward it and afraid of it at the same time. Curiosity requires courage on both fronts.

Curiosity + Empathy = Relational Intimacy. Just as hydrogen and oxygen form water, curiosity fused with empathy creates something new: genuine relational security and intimacy. Without empathy, curiosity becomes data-mining — and data can become a weapon.

Curiosity without good motives causes destruction. We should be honest about why we're seeking to know someone, and we don't owe everyone unlimited access to our story.

This Week's Challenge

1. Get curious about yourself — dig to the base level of the Communication Pyramid. What do you really believe about your rights and responsibilities?
2. Get curious about someone close to you — ask one or two deeper questions about their upbringing, dreams, or a goal they've set aside.
3. Before asking others to be vulnerable, earn that right by being trustworthy with what you already know — and by going first.

Visit Stephanie Presents for resources, to book speaking engagements, and get the weekly newsletter, Godly Impact.

Click here to order your copy of The Great Brain Remodel of Adolescence or purchase from Amazon

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#family

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#parenting

#raisinggodlykids

#bible

#faith

#truth

#biblestudy

#christianfaith

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#curiosity