ME DON'T WANT TO PLAY NO CAT AND MOUSE WITH YOUR SWEET TREATS.

Jack and Ash have hankered on many topics, but the subject of sweet treats is one that turns out to provoke A LOT of strong opinions, like "Almond milk is for punks" and "Marzipan is a friend to no man".

Talking of things small and delicious, Ash has been having steamy dreams about Timothée Chalamet, while Jack has finally figured out what his biggest bugbear is.

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Jack and Ash are experiencing World Cup fever, with a particular interest in what should be worn at the pub and how to really nail the definition of the off-side rule. There's also plenty of random hankers on whether Ash should shave her head, pan flute dolls, and Jack's depressing visit to a strip club.

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What's worse: not knowing when to use 'there' and 'their' or constantly leaving your phone lying around expecting other people to look after it? Answer: they're both as bad as each other, and poor Jack is constantly having to deal with both of them.

There's also much to hanker on regarding why people can't speak on the phone anymore, the nine-toed phenomenon, and the fact that Ash is related to one of the Suffragettes.

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Oh... AND WE'RE PLAYING A LIVE SHOW!

Come and hanker down with us at The Hackney Empire, London on Saturday, 19th of September 2026!

Patreon Paid Members Ticket Pre-Sale: 10am, Tuesday, 30th of June.

General Ticket Sale: 10am, Wednesday, 1st of July.

Tickets will be available at:

https://www.hackneyempire.co.uk/events/the-jack-ash-show-live

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There's much to hanker on after an amayszing time at Primavera, but it wasn't all sunshine and mii miii's...

Ash had a journey home so full of moroseness that she was basically stuck in an infinite jive for 12 hours, whereas Jack found himself being blown around Barcelona like a Chocolonely wrapper in the breeze looking for somewhere to rest his beautiful head.

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There's a spooky hanker in the air... Horror films, Basque Cheesecakes, Dominatrices - it doesn't bear!

Jack, fresh from sampling the delights of the Dutch, has come back feeling a little strange after accidentally revisiting a nightclub that changed him for life. While Ash has found her old yearbook from school, which raises more questions than it answers.

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After last week's X Factor-shaped cliffhanger, Jack and Ash have come armed with the final part of the saga... For now...

There are also big revelations to hanker on, including being a petri dish baby, being a dirty bestest friend, and what happened when Ash got robbed at a service station?

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How did Jack and Ash actually meet? It's time for the origin story of all origin stories...

From nerve-wracking X Factor auditions and bootcamp blues to backstage dramas and tabloid intrigue, this is a tale of woe, plot twists, and high-waisted trousers..

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There's so much DARKNESS in the world right now. Lying mirrors, secretive back rooms at Glastonbury, and the salacious origins of BOP-IT.

Thankfully, Jack and Ash are here to spread some light and joy to fight back the shadows! 🙏🏻

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