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The Fall of Magic

The Master's Core, Book 1

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About this listen

The world still carries its wounds from the first age as it heals from the devastation caused by the War of Strife and Sorrow. A new danger looms, threatening to plunge the world of Auro into an age of darkness, yet amidst the gloom, there exists hope—a fragile thing, either rewarded or punished by fate.

A once noble prince, infected by the corruption of the fade, leads his sinister army across the land, leaving destruction in their wake. His sights are set on the realm where the gods once walked among the people. The prince’s ultimate goal: to obliterate the sacred seat of hope and virtue—the elven city of Valenthreas.

Volir, a lone elf with a hidden past, trains with the Knights of the Phoenix, legendary warriors who defy the darkness. His only desire: to be chosen by a phoenix and leave Valenthreas to live out his days in solitude.

Now, with the entire realm at risk and his parents’ unjust death haunting his mind, he must make a choice—one that will echo throughout the annals of history, shaping the destiny of all. Will he choose to follow the light within?

©2024 Phoenix Rokni (P)2024 Phoenix Rokni Action & Adventure Epic Fantasy Destiny Royalty
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If I had to sum this up in one sentence, I'd say great premise, horribly boring execution. If you're like me and repetition of information and prose annoys you, I'd say don't go for this one.

Almost every character "said" everything. Sometimes literally
"What?" A said, "yes" b said, "that's crazy" c said. especially listening to an audiobook, it became so annoying. Replied, added, pointed out, noted, questioned, beckoned.. so many words that could be used but it was all very descriptive and made it not feel fantasy enough for me.

Lot of repetition and useless descriptions of people one after another, instead of building it into the story. One time 10 people were described one after another. In a style of "He was tall and slender. he was, he was, he had, etc" and one person looked like this, the next one like this. Just a bland description.

Lots of repetitions of descriptions as well, eg the MMC describing his armour, and then the sage repeating it about 2 mins later nearly word by word.

Some information overly described, while others are not explained (like who anyeva is) - with so many characters and gods, there should've been more explanation when going along. There's no real explanation how sorrow and strife work with the fade, does one cause the other? Just too much knowledge missing and not given enough information.

The concept is good, but it's not descriptive enough for a fantasy series and too many important details are not explained whereas minor details are overly expressed.

With the two groups (mages and knights) there was a lot of opportunity to clear up things like what elixir does what, especially in the later parts of the book. Most things were just described rather than observed through characters which is a real miss. I had high hopes for this but overall, can't give this more than 3 stars because of the lacking writing skills. I hope he fires his editor for the next book and gets good feedback so the second book will be better!

Great premise, too descriptive and repetitive writing

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